August 22, 2008

It's 2:45 AM. Bed. Too much brain stuff. So type.
I figured out why I've been so tempermental as of late. It's not Rollins's dark poetic musings that have been making me angry, but the return of the college masses. I find their behavior and attitudes to be sickening, an utter disappointment. They haven't come to college to better themselves, they have descended upon Normal, Illinois like newly hatched locusts to do what fresh parasites do: rut and ruin everything. Mom and dad aren't around any longer to pull the leach back when kiddie does something out of line. This new sense of self is transisted as "freedom" when it's actually "responsibility". Giving a teenager the free-range to hold a beer and score some pot is the same difference as signing an eight year old up to the NRA as a birthday present.
I fear more than anything coming off as crass or pious, I really do. The last thing I want is to be didactic. But the other thing I fear - almost as bad as being a self-righteous, hypicritical prick - is wasted potential. Allen Ginsberg famously lamented the great minds of his generation being destroyed by madness. I fear the great minds of my generation, and those behind me, falling victim to apathy and ignorance. For a mind to rather watch television than read a book is dangerous. I am saddened by this. Some cat walks out of math class and straight into his dorm room, throws his book on the floor, and turns on the Gamecube. I am angered by this. I'm not afraid of Osama Bin Laden or the Chinese, soccer mom. I'm not afraid of this newly militant (apparently) populace of homosexuals whose mission it is to destroy the infidel straight families of America, Senator Lott. I'm afraid of Coors Light. I'm afraid of Mario. Shit, I'm even afraid of Will Smith. From twenty years ago, that is. I talked with a guy tonight who watches "Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" reruns instead of doing his homework.
That's why I'm so angry. These kids are the future of America, my country. They are flushing it down with as much indifference as a prom date baby. My country will not survive and grow up in the sewers to be some sort of mutant creature terrorizing the night's alley-ways, raping women and eating cats. No. It will simply fade into cognitive obscurity, not unlike a brain-damaged invalid. And I will pull the plug. I would rather see my nation burn and die than become what the TV tells me is true. That is why I'm angry. I'll not go willingly. No thank you.